Thursday, 24 February 2011

CSI Stevenage

This morning I came down early, I like to get up before anyone else,
it gives me a chance to have my tablets and a little quiet time
before the day begins.

But this was to be no ordinary day....

Something had happened here last night, and it wasn't good......

If fact it was so, wasn't good, it was bad.....

At first I didn't think anything of the sticky blobs on the kitchen work top.
I had washed up and tidied the kitchen last night. They were not there then.
And without thinking, I washed my cup up this morning.
And without thinking I wiped down the kitchen work top.
But now there were sticky blobs which I just wiped away,
without thinking....

But there were more, one on the kettle, two on the toaster and three
on the cooker top and five on the microwave.....
something was not adding up......

I followed the remaining blobs and quickly realised that
this was a crime scene......

Stepping back and releasing my camera from it's holster,
I pointed it in the direction of these red blobs.
Could it be blood? human blood?...

No, it was worse than that, it was Ketchup...

I knew instantly what kind of menace I was dealing with here,
but I needed to gather evidence if I was to secure a conviction.

In my mind there was only one suspect.....





This menace to society had no regard for the safety of others and had clearly committed a crime that they felt would go undetected....

The ketchup had reached the back of the book shelf, this must have been a frenzied attack, to splatter the ketchup this far as to reach behind the
"Delia smiths complete cookery guide"


Not only was it on the ceiling.....


It was on the floor.......




And even on the cupboard door......






In haste the culprit had wiped their hand on a nearby cloth,
this would be their downfall...so much evidence, so little time,
I had to work quickly and find their weapon before they struck again......






But they were no match for my cunning, for there, on the kitchen work top,
near the microwave, and just behind the pen pot,
was what I had been looking for......





The perpetrator of this hideous crime would pay, and pay dearly for their sins.

They could not do this and expect to get away Scott free....


I suspect a life sentence will be issued, incarceration at the very least.
They should be made to clean up this mess and be made accountable,
the public deserves nothing less...
When he wakes up of course.....




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