Friday, 22 July 2011

Schools out

I'm kind of cheating on my blog today, this is what I have written on my Facebook page and I thought I'd share it here too as It's been quite a crazy week, what with being the last week of school. There have been sports days for the boys, a community day, an appointment at school to see Jim's teacher, assembly's, end of year scrap books to make, cards and presents to buy, a garden to strim, shopping to get, a poorly cat to attend to, an enjoyable afternoon with Mum spent finding old songs on YouTube and drinking coffee, a magnetic door catch to fix, berries to pick and finally, Charlotte and I still must find the time to attach the new cat flap to the storeroom door...


So, this is from my Facebook page..


As the kids break up today and say their goodbyes to the teachers and their friends, I thought I might say a few goodbyes of my own today.. Firstly to my peace and quite, I will truly miss you.. To the remote control, we have been good friends I know but, for a while we must part.. To the food in the fridge, goodbye...*sniff* To my tidy house, please don't be sad. I promise that, come September I will come and find you...To my three cats.. yes they will be home until September but I have left the shed door ajar for you... Lastly, to my sanity....Goodbye my old friend, until we meet again..



Friday, 15 July 2011

Good morning, I am Mrs Grouch....

I'm feeling a bit grouchy today.... Nothing in particular has made me feel this way, nothing I can really put my finger on....

OK, who am I trying to kid.? I am totally lying... I am grouchy and annoyed because of lots of small things... One of them being Jim...The other is Katie. :(

I am not usually a grouchy person, generally I am quite happy and content with my life. But it's funny how, when lots of things are minor irritations, they can all add up and get me into a grouchy mood. I have one of them today. But I will try to shake that mood off because I don't like the way it makes me feel and it is a glorious day outside. The last thing I want is to not see the blue sky over head because of this grouchy cloud above me right now.

So, here is what I am grouchy about..

This morning Katie took so long in the bathroom that she only left me ten minutes to get washed, dressed out the door in time to take her to school. When I mentioned that she will have to go by herself today as I won't have time to get ready and take her, she said "Well can't you hurry up?".... usually I have got myself washed and dressed before the children, but today Jim took until 7:30 to actually get out of bed after my repeatedly calling him.. by now his toast was cold and he wanted cereal instead. He fixed himself some cereal and ate it as slowly as is humanly possible. This had put me behind, and so I was not washed or dressed and now was running half an hour late.

Katie said she had already washed as she put on her shirt. I asked if she had washed her armpits and she looked into the shirt pocket and quietly said "yes" ...... This was clearly not the case and so she was sent upstairs to wash again, this time washing the bits she had missed first time around.. Hence her taking so long and me only having ten minutes....

The minor irritations were beginning to add up....

Minor irritation number 1...

The carpet runner. Always gravitating towards the front door, no matter which way round you put it, it always works it's way to the front door. There is the constant job of pulling it back into place... However, I can totally understand it's need to escape out of the front door. I have every sympathy for it, it can't be easy being a carpet runner these days, especially in this house...



Minor irritation number 2...

Not reading the poster. Being the ever efficient Mother that I am , I feel the constant need to remind the children of even the most elementary of requirements... The simple task of flushing the toilet and washing your hands is a basic requirement in human society. It shows consideration for others in your household as well as the hygienic disposal of waste...

Even with a chuffin poster next to their face as they wee and poo, they still forget to wash and flush... I have even seen cats flush the toilet on you tube.... how hard can it be.....??????



Minor irritation number3...

The squeased from the middle toothpaste tube. I suppose I should be just glad they cleaned their teeth but I often wonder, with the amount of toothpaste left in the sink and the window sill, did any of it go in their mouth????




Minor irritation number 4....

The abandoned socks... Yes, the abandoned sock, or socks in this case.. This particular pair was once attached to Sam's feet and at some point in the evening were detached from said feet and thrown at Katie.. Katie, not wanting to have these touch her, ran for cover and the socks landed at the bottom of the stairs, where it was formally declared that "you touched them last"........... No one wanting to admit to touching them last, the socks were left as they fell and of course, no one wanted to pick them up and put them in the washing. Heaven forbid..

These socks also have some of those annoying grass darts attached to them just for good measure..




Minor irritation number 5....

The pile of crap no one wants to take upstairs and put away...
This one pretty much speaks for itself, it has been there for at least a week and there is probably something that belongs to everyone in that pile...
Just in case you wondered what it all was I shall tell you... there is a black tie, a DVD case (empty), A Barbie scarf, a small denim purse, a plastic brick wall and a scourer from the bathroom upstairs...



Minor irritation number 6....

The running tap...

OK, so I need to replace the washer as it drips and cannot be fully turned off. But this is running and it doesn't seem to bother anyone else but me....





Major irritation number 7.....

The toilet roll on the floor... I hate this one with a passion. Please, for the love of God will people please not leave the toilet roll on the floor..... I find it a struggle to bend down to floor level and pick up the toilet roll, especially in the morning... I might suspend some from the ceiling on a piece string above the toilet like a bird feeder... No matter how many times I ask, It always ends up left on the floor...





Even after making a poster that is next to their face as they wee and poo...




Minor irritation number 8...

The used tissue... Usually the used tissue is stuffed down the sofa or simply let fall to the floor.... On more than one occasion I have retrieved a used tissue from the inside of the toilet roll roll and sometimes screwed up and put through the handle of a cup... This one is left on the desk and of course, no one touched it last...



Major irritation number 9...

The contents of Jim's pencil case... This, for me, is a massive annoyance.. Each week more or less I get a phone call from Jim's Head of year informing me that Jim has come to school without the appropriate equipment.. We now have good communication between the school and myself and I am on first name terms with most of the staff a Jim's school... They totally understand my position when it comes to Jim's schooling and that fact that Jim can be destructive even with his own possessions.. I spend lots of money replacing lost and broken items. I have made Jim use his pocket money to replace what he has lost or broken but sometimes the pocket money does not cover it. Last week I went into town a bought a handful of cheap clear plastic pencil cases, new pencils, pens, maths sets and a few of the cheap 68p calculators.. He has lost the pencil case, the rubber is in about twenty chewed pieces, the pencils are snapped, the calculator will now not calculate and he has sharpened, to a point, the plastic end of the compass...

I am so annoyed, I could spit feathers...



Thursday, 14 July 2011

Please tell me, what is rong with my family....??

While tidying Katie's bedroom, I came across this lovely little book that she has made. Reading through the story I realise that it must have been written a few months ago as Katie mentions that she is soon to be 10 years old...

I was not wholly unsurprised to read the title, as it is a question I often ask myself....

I was intrigued. If Katie had the answer, I really need to know what it is...




Chapter one: How it started...




Katie seems to have deduced that, my being married to her Dad was the beginning of what was rong...




So, Charlotte was born. Then Jim and Sam (not twins) were born. Yep, following you so far...



I see, we are getting to the actual reason now. It seems as though Jim and Sam play a vital role in what is rong... I would agree, the squabbling is really a problem. But wait a minute, this is the last page....

You can't finish there. Katie, I really need to know the answer...... but you are right, that is not a good likeness of you at all....




It is an unfinished masterpiece. Just like Jane Austen's "The Watsons". I will never know what is rong with our family...

There are times when every one has been told off or needs to be, the house looks like a bombs hit it, the television is on but no one is watching it, the cats are eating the carpet and a toilet roll silently unravels all the way down the stairs, that I scream to the heavens these actual words..

I think actually I am more concerned that Katie wrote a book (with illustrations) and asked the question, what is rong with my family?. She has confirmed my fears...

It must be true, there really is something rong with our family.


Wednesday, 13 July 2011

Sports Day

Sports Day.... A word that strikes fear into the hearts of most Mum's who can't even run for the bus without fear of collapse... Yes, don't you just love Sports day... Fortunately for me, having a really bad back, omits me from the Mum's race in sports day..

Some years ago while at Katie's infant school sports day, the Mum's race ended with a pile up near the finish line and a few twisted ankles and bent back fingers, not to mention the damaged pride of these ungainly Mums.. At that moment my friend Francis and I looked at each other in disbelief and said "Now That's why there shouldn't be a Mum's race"

However, Katie's sports day went really well yesterday and overall her team came second out of eight teams.

There was the usual running races, relay races and obstacle races. No egg and spoon race though, probably for health and safety reasons like the threat of salmonella. In Katie's school the events are done in teams and they move on to each event around the field, after five minutes the bell is rung, the scores handed in and they move on to the next event. Last year they had to build as many sandcastles as they could in five minutes, they enjoyed that one.



In this event you had to walk backwards on the beam without falling off, in each group there were a selection of children from all the year groups and so some found this harder than others. They all did a good job and were cheered along by the three parents that were watching..




In this event the idea was to build the tallest tower made with one colour of blocks..




Next they had to gently knock the Velcro ball onto the sticky mat and score points for the nearest to the middle. Katie, whilst waiting for her turn walloped the ball across the field and missed her next go whilst she retrieved it...



There was a short break for our team and a cup of juice. While they sat and had a breather the children answered questions to score more points. The three parents (including me) had to answer a question as well... If I had known I would have been asked when man first set foot on the moon,
I would have looked it up... apparently it was on 21st July 1969..



Next, a game where you had to weave in and out of the cones using your hockey stick and a ball as quickly as possible..




Penalty shoot out was interesting, I think more time was spent retrieving the footballs from the end of the field than actually scoring... It may have been more helpful if the net had been tied to the goal...





This game was fun, the children had to pass the ball backwards over their heads to the child behind and they then had to pass the ball between their legs to the next child and so on, when the ball eventually go to the end of the line, the last child had to run to the front where the game began again.








I think the best way to describe this game would be "Organised Chaos"


Next was simply chucking a bean bag into a hoop...



Dunking a ball was straight forward enough, you would think.... again, retrieving the balls was very time consuming... and yes, it did go in..


Next up, a mini obstacle race. The idea was to balance a bean bag on your head while going through a small tunnel and then walk across the beam without dropping it...




I think Katie should have got extra points for her ingenuity.




And her cunning plan worked too..



She was aloud to get away with this as the rules do not say that you can't use a head band. I bet next year the rules will have the sub heading "the use of head bands or hair modifications are prohibited"...




So, nearly there now. After three hours of wandering around a drafty field and wishing I'd brought a flask of coffee and a deck chair, we have the running races...



Of which I filmed and didn't take pictures of. They were simply going too fast.....


Finally, Katie is proudly showing off her two stickers for third and second place in her races...
Didn't she do well...


Monday, 11 July 2011

I'm Sorry Charlotte...

Charlotte had a very long fringe, it was past her glasses and really was getting in the way.

This morning I asked if she would like me to trim it, so she could see where she was going..

Reluctantly she agreed..



I'm sorry I cut your fringe,
But how was I to know,
I'm sorry it's far too short
And I've made your eyebrows show.


I hope you can forgive me,
I just want to let you know,
You'll feel much better in a week or two
When you start to see it grow.


But, you do have lovely eyes you see,
I'm sure no one will laugh,
At just how short your fringe is
Now that it's cut in half.


I really feel so bad you see,
I know you don't feel good,
With a short, wonky, half cut fringe
That doesn't look like what it should.


So after tea I promise,
You can trim my hair,
Do your worst, I'll shut my eyes
I think that's only fair......




Cat's special presents...

It is now mid summer, what on earth have I been up to??? Well, everything and nothing much really. I have had a kind of "bloggers block". There have been many things I wanted to write about but, when It came to it, I couldn't find the words or the time to tell you all about it.

I think I'll start with what the cats have been up to. Mostly bringing in "presents" for us. You can just imagine how many "presents" we get from three cats who think "presents" are a good idea.

Apparently frogs make a loud squeaking noise when a cat bites them and then brings then in the house at 2am.. They make the same noise at 4am too. Initially, I thought it was a dogs squeaky toy that they had found and they were making it squeak.... not so. We have had at least 20 frogs brought into the house and most of them have been helped back into the garden by either myself of one of the children. Sometimes the same poor old frog gets brought back in ten minutes later by the same cat.. We then have to find a better hopping away spot for the frog to go, usually under a bush, half way up the road. Some frogs however have not been so lucky, they have been found dead and dried out behind the sofa...

We have also had a "present" brought in by Charlie. I was hoovering at the time and Katie was calling out to me that "Charlie has a marrow".. Where on earth did Charlie get a Marrow??? ... Not only that, how could he even carry such a large vegetable??.. As the hoover went quiet Katie was still shouting "No, Charlie has a sparrow!!" Truthfully, a marrow would have been preferable... However, we cornered Charlie as he still had the sparrow in his mouth, head first... Katie gently took it from him and held it in her hands. It was on it's back and was clearly distressed.. I took it from her and turned it up the right way. We stepped outside and as soon and the sparrow realised it was outside I felt it suddenly move as if to take off. I held out my hands and away it flew, up into the sky and over the houses far away. That was one lucky sparrow...

Florrie's "present" was not so fortunate. It was the biggest pigeon I have ever seen. It was found, still attached to Florrie and he was growling when ever you came near. Eventually he gave up and ran out the door without his prize. I then had to remove the dead pigeon from behind the television. I wrapped it in kitchen roll and I ceremoniously placed it in the brown wheelie bin..

I forgot to mention that a couple of months ago, the "presents" were all the fish from the pond next door... The house next door had not been let at that time and so, with no one to check, the pond in their garden was slowly drying up. The water at the edge was quite shallow and so Florrie, in-particular, was fishing out the fish one by one and bringing them in to us. One such fish did not die straight away and flapped around for a while on the back door mat. This fish (swimmy) spent the next week recovering in a glass casserole dish on the kitchen worktop until Florrie, despite a large bread board and a stack of books on top, managed to get at Swimmy one more time and poor Swimmy was done for...

As If it couldn't get any worse, Charlie has brought in the "most special present". Not a fish, not a frog, not a pigeon or a sparrow.... No, Charlie's "special present" was half a french stick.... I have no idea where it was from, but if we had a cat flap, he would have never got it through...